How Dating Apps Made Me Think Differently About The Colour Of My Skin

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As a woman of color, I never really thought much about my race when it came to dating. I had always believed that love knows no color and that the most important thing was finding someone who truly understood and appreciated me for who I am. However, my perspective changed when I started using dating apps.

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The Pressure to Fit In

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When I first started using dating apps, I was excited about the prospect of meeting new people and potentially finding love. However, I quickly realized that my experience was going to be different from that of my white friends. On dating apps, I noticed that there was a certain pressure to fit into a specific mold of beauty that was predominantly white. Many of the profiles I came across seemed to prioritize white features and I couldn't help but feel like I didn't quite measure up.

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The Impact of Eurocentric Beauty Standards

The prevalence of Eurocentric beauty standards on dating apps made me question my own beauty and worth. I started to become hyper-aware of my skin color and how it may be perceived by others. I found myself constantly comparing myself to the women I saw on these apps and wondering if my skin color was a hindrance to finding love.

The Role of Implicit Bias

As I continued to use dating apps, I couldn't help but notice the role of implicit bias in the online dating world. I often found myself being fetishized for my race, with some individuals expressing a specific interest in dating someone of my ethnicity. While it may seem flattering at first, I soon realized that it was objectifying and dehumanizing. It made me feel like my worth was reduced to nothing more than my skin color, and that was a difficult realization to come to terms with.

Learning to Embrace My Identity

Despite the challenges I faced on dating apps, I eventually learned to embrace my identity and recognize the beauty in my skin color. I realized that I didn't need to conform to anyone else's standards of beauty and that my worth wasn't dependent on the validation of others. I started to appreciate the unique aspects of my culture and heritage, and I became more confident in my own skin.

Reframing the Narrative

Through my experiences on dating apps, I have come to understand the importance of reframing the narrative around beauty and race. It's crucial to challenge the Eurocentric beauty standards that are perpetuated in the media and on dating apps, and to celebrate diversity in all its forms. I have become more vocal about the issues of race and representation in the dating world, and I hope to inspire others to do the same.

Moving Forward with Confidence

While dating apps may have initially made me question my worth and beauty, they have also helped me to grow and become more confident in my identity. I have learned to navigate the complexities of online dating as a woman of color, and I am now more empowered to embrace my unique qualities and stand tall in my own skin.

Conclusion

In conclusion, my experiences on dating apps have made me think differently about the color of my skin. I have come to realize the impact of Eurocentric beauty standards, implicit bias, and the pressure to fit into a specific mold of beauty. However, I have also learned to embrace my identity and challenge the narrative around race and beauty. I hope that my story can inspire others to do the same and to celebrate diversity in all its forms.